Miss Missing You
by Mounted Ranger Black
Summary: After reuniting at a Ranger gathering, Kimberly realizes she has ultimately lost the one man who loved her the most after the disastrous break-up letter sent to Tommy.


Rocky had his back to her as she stepped through the screen door. The rest of the ex-Rangers were outside enjoying the evening with a cookout, but his day went downhill when he saw her again. His heart wasn't ready for the pain she brought back with her, but his mind told him to forget about the pain. He grimaced as he felt her get closer.

"Why won't you look at me Rocky? I barely got a 'hello, how's life been lately?' from you, when I figured you'd be the most excited to see me back." She chewed her lip. "Besides, it was only a few years I was gone. Even Tommy is over it." She said, still staring at his back.

Rocky shrugged, leaning against the counter. He squeezed his eyes shut, still seeing her warm whiskey eyes as she smiled that summer before she left. He had said goodbye, but she didn't mean the 'I love you' she told him. And it took over a year before he realized it.

He shook his head. "You don't understand. You left, and I kept thinking you'd come back sooner. Kept thinking you would call back faster or write sooner. But you didn't. And I was stupid enough to think you actually cared, that you actually loved me. I was wrong," he added softly. His head dropped down, dark hair falling over his dark and cloudy eyes. He sighed.

She was shocked. All this time, and she hadn't known he loved her that way. Then it dawned on her. "The letters I kept getting from you. You never gave up on me, even after what I did. And I ignored you before that, but you kept trying. I can't believe I didn't see it. The valentines card, the birthday gift, christmas gift, Halloween letter, everything. I didn't realize... Rocky, I'm so sorry." she covered her mouth with her hand. Tears ran down her face.

"I'll be fine. But, you were my picket fence. You were my always and everything. I miss you. Hell I miss missing you. I can't miss someone if they don't realize how much I care for them." He ran a shaky hand across his face.

"I'm so sorry..."

"Sometimes, before it gets better, the darkness gets bigger. The person I'd take a bullet for was behind the trigger. And that hurts the most. Knowing I tried so hard for so long, just to be ignored and shot down, hurts like a bullet to the heart." He finally stood up, towering over her petite frame. Turning around, she saw the buried pain and torment hidden in his dark irises. He was on the verge of tears, but didn't dare cry. "I can't take back the years I loved you, but I can move past it and try and forget. I just hope that you can too." Rocky headed to the front door, wiping his eyes as he picked up his helmet. "Try to forgive and forget me, Kimberly. I know I will for you."

Kimberly didn't hear the door open or shut behind him, shock still clouding her mind. Only when his motorcycle started up did she look up and run to the door. She wretched it open and began to chase him down the road. He didn't slow down, even though he may have seen her. She stopped in the street, sobbing uncontrollably.

Tommy and Adam came to her first, followed by the rest of the Originals. Arms encircled her as she cried over the man who loved her with everything he had, and she blew it off. And now he was the best thing she'd never have.

Two days later, watching the news in Tommy's kitchen with the rest of the remaining Rangers, a news broadcaster announced the death of a hero. All eyes were glued to the screen as a picture of Rocky DeSantos flashed before them. "Rocky DeSantos, also known as the Blue Zeo Ranger 3, was found dead at his home in Stone Canyon yesterday. Reports show that DeSantos was killed by suicide. A bullet wound to the heart seems to be the main cause of death. A note was found, as well as a picture and his 'Zeonizers', near the body. His request was that the Originals make an appearance to collect his "Rangers memories that were too hard to bear alone." He also had a special request for the love of the Pink Pterodactyl Ranger." The newscaster changed topics, but the Rangers were beyond shocked.

"I did this, didn't I?" Kim asked quietly, crying again. "I killed him." She bawled into her hands, her body shaking with sobs.

Tommy rubbed her back as she mourned. "No you didn't. We are equally at fault. We didn't know anything was wrong, and we never knew he loved you like that." The former Green/White/Red Ranger soothed her, finally pulling her into his strong arms. He could feel her tears soaking his shirt but he didn't care.

The next week would be hell for all the Rangers. Rocky was a key member of the team, now gone. Everybody mourned, but none mourned as long or as full of suffering as Kimberly. The funeral, wake, and aftermath of it all was horrible on each individual that felt touched by Rocky DeSantos. The Rangers were still mad that he would reveal his identity, although they were too grief-stricken to really talk about it.

When Rocky's blue and red flowers were pulled from the top of the casket, Kimberly felt herself getting stronger. She smiled as she thought of Rocky in Heaven, flying about and cracking jokes, smiling that amazing and humor filled smile at everyone. She wiped her eyes, knowing that he didn't need to deal with the bullshit of modern life. This made her smile. Rocky never dealt with bullshit, because he stopped it or proved it false before it could become a successful rumor. As the dirt was thrown on top, effectively hiding Rocky from the rest of the world, Kimberly felt something that felt kind of like arms wrapped around her comfortably. She sighed.

"I love you too, Rocko." She whispered.

8 years later...

Rocky was sitting in Kimberly's room, waiting for her to return home from the hospital. She had ended up marrying Adam Park, and was currently in labor with their first child. Rocky smiled, his best friend had married the love of Rocky's life, and decided to name their first child after the Blue Zeo somehow.

At 11:45 am, Adam and Kimberly Park welcomed Rocky James into the world, at 21", 9 #, the kid was big, just like his Uncle Rocky. Rocky had to smile wider at this.

The next day, the happy family came home, and was enjoying the company together. Rocky stood in the shadows, simply watching what he could have had with the Pink Ranger. Sighing, he placed a hand on Adam's arm before disappearing. Adam looked up smiling, knowing Rocky was watching over them.

"What's wrong Adam?" A tired Kimberly asked from her spot on the couch.

"Nothing... Just felt like Rocko was here is all. He would be proud."

Rocky smiled as he drifted away, not knowing where he was going. He closed his eyes as a feeling of peace washed over him. He knew Kimberly finally forgave him, and he was okay with her never forgetting him. His essence left the ground, flying up at a rapid speed. The blue light of the rising hero crackled with energy, and he found himself whooping with delight. Once he hit the clouds, the light disappeared, and Rocky was finally home.

Adam and Kimberly were looking out their window when a strange blue light appeared. It shot upwards, like a bullet. They watched as it hit the cloud line, bursting in a display of color. They shared a smile.

Rocky DeSantos bounced on the clouds, smiling and laughing. A voice called to him, and he began to run to it, pure happiness radiating off of him. He was finally where he belonged, and he wasn't going to leave.


End file.
